drastically in every direction, but the feeling of my ever-e

I’ve been using they/them pronouns for seven years now. My presentation over those years has changed drastically in every direction, but the feeling of my ever-expansive gender hasn’t: The one constant is its ability to really surprise me. To me, my gender means fecundity, abundance. It isn’t a gravel path with high breeze-block walls on either side, but a forest in late summer filled with ripe berries and wild animals (no wasps, though) that is mine to roll about in. It isn’t updating the pronouns in my email bio. It isn’t being grateful that there’s an “other” box when I’m booking an EasyJet flight. And it certainly isn’t reminding someone every time that “I…err…actually use they/them pronouns…sorry…thanks…” with an awkward shuffle of the feet.

But every now and then, I need reminding of that. Because at some point—I don’t remember when exactly—being trans in public became more violent than ever, and consequently more boring than ever.